50 Things I’d Like To See Affiliate Programs Or Be Paid For…
As the title of this post says…
This list comprises of 50 things that if an affiliate program were put into action they would help promote the cause/service or things we should be compensated for as a user or part of the official program:
(In no particular order)
- The emergency services of 911 (just dialing it!).
- Reporting sharks that swim too close to the shore.
- Reffering customers to your local drug dealers.
- Gun shops.
- Insane asylums.
- Telling people they are being cheated on.
- Finding pedophiles online.
- The black market.
- Organ donors.
- Adoption agencies.
- Getting people to use breath mints and/or deoderant.
- Reporting illegal aliens to the INS.
- Outting fraudsters and scammers.
- Discouraging severly overweight people from going to Krispy Kreme.
- Being a good wingman.
- Being a sober driver.
- Wearing a condom, even though you know they kill off 99% of the feeling!
- Dealing with your family on the holidays.
- Reporting advertisements that are just too annoying for words.
- Sending immigrants to a place that teaches English.
- Completing four years of Highschool.
- Using the carpool lane.
- Telling people to stop farting and picking their nose in public.
- Smacking someone in a movie theater for not turning off their cellphone ringer.
- Cash incentive for people who say “ya’ll” to stop reproducing.
- Joining the armed services (not just for personnel, but for civilians too!)
- Reporting people who can’t drive or honk too often.
- Companies that lease out booth girls who aren’t idiots.
- Having to learn Spanish or French in school.
- Jury duty.
- Reporting inside trading.
- Coming up with dialogue or title ideas for porn videos.
- Spreading the word about movies, tv shows, and sporting events.
- Going on blind dates (bonus if you met them online).
- Real explainations of modern art paintings to explain to the REST of the world what the fuck that painting really is!
- Pretending country music is real music.
- Someone to collect evidence we can use in court to finally convict Michael Jackson for being a pedo.
- The right to smack anyone who calls someone who knows how to use a computer or the internet a “computer genius” or “computer whiz”.
- A service that convinces companies NOT to let Google buy them.
- Helping old ladies cross the street.
- Outting priests who molest boys.
- Making an education program for the Middle East to show them that just because we don’t believe in your God, doesn’t mean we should die.
- Sitting through a school play or recital without thinking about suicide.
- Shipping extreme liberals to Canada (they are friendly there, let them deal with these idiots).
- Getting the government to pass a law requiring all sidewalks and stairs to be automatic escalators.
- Affiliate program for selling state lottery tickets already!
- Hailing a cab and letting an old person get inside instead of you.
- Not using the handicap bathroom stall.
- Not going through a red light or stopping at a STOP sign at 3am on an empty road/street.
- Admitting that Jon - writer of this list - is a fucking genius, but bored out of his mind!
There are definitely LOADS more.. but after writing so many, I’m all out of ideas for now. Feel free to leave your ideas in the comments area.




























12. Reporting illegal aliens to the INS.
Thats probably the best one LOL.
You where the only one online on aim, I was woundering what you where doing up at 5am haha
Well, I’ve got news for you!. You CAN MAKE MONEY on all of these topics. Just visit my website and download my FREE EBOOK!!!!! All you have to paid is 150.00 shipping and handling, then you can download the book from my site. Check it out, it will make you RICH!!!!
you seem bored to death, go to africa kenya to be precise for a week or 2 (mombase and unwind.
hehehe watch out for simba and his bitch ass son. They are not the lazy ass lions you get over at the san diego zoo so dont go patting them saying hellloooooo, do you want something to eat. If you do that will be the end of aojon.
what the hell am i posting.
Nmwando..
Here’s a tip for ya:
The next time you smoke your black colored crack, make sure you are nowhere near a computer or anything with internet access for that matter.
You and i are thinking the same thing.
for a minute i sat down looking around took a deep breath and wondered, jesus kid wtf did you just write on that mans blog. Its the only way we can stop time, that and directing movies like revenge of the kick ass spyda.
Its one of those days man. Just sorry you had to be on my path.
Amen. Thanks for all the info aojon. Trying to unwind after a copy writing marathon.
Stay Frosty
PMSL! Fuckin Genius….
Might suggest no 3 to a few peeps… make a killing!
[…] Jon on Super Affiliate Marketing Blog has made an very funny post of 50 things he’d like to be able to receive affiliate payments for doing. Actually, I see some real business ideas in here: […]
[…] on Super Affiliate Marketing Blog has made an very funny post of 50 things he’d like to be able to receive affiliate payments […]